NEXT!

Is it me or is he flirting? I've been sitting in my crush's cafe for over an hour. I've been paying attention. I've counted. Seven. Seven times, he has been looking at me and when I look up he smiles. This is a fairly normal occurrence so I decided to count today. I can pretty much rely on him looking at me at some point if I am looking at him or if he passes by my general vicinity or if he accidentally happens to look in my direction. No exaggeration. He goes to the restroom, he spots me. He restocks the straws and on his way back to the counter, he smiles at me. Ok, yeah, I'm looking at him too if I am actually getting a smile and smiling back, but what the hell does this mean? I am so retarded. I'm thinking, if he liked me he would go beyond the smiling after a month. I finally did the introductions as you all know. I'm thinking he has a girlfriend? I'm thinking he thinks I'm way older than he is. My friend Beth decided he is WAY younger than me so now I have that to add on to reasons why we don't get beyond big face smiles and chit chat. I'm thinking I need a life and another crush to increase the odds. I'm thinking that I am ridiculous.

It's really damn hot again today. It's making me spacey and day dreamy. I just went off into la la land. I'll spare you the gory details of my teenage style fantasies. Speaking of fantasies...I have an idea for an indie style chick flick. Anyone interested in being my writing partner? I'll do the writing... just need someone to help me along with some brainstorming and moving forward. I have the beginning, the end and the conflict ready to be turned into something more.

I went to school today. Yes. Finally. I'm really excited about getting back into the learning mode. After some discussion I may be changing tracks until I get my associates. I won't bore you with the details. As it turns out, I am already half way there so I may as well get it under my belt and move on to working on the dreams through a bachelors program instead. More meat behind the accomplishment. Don't hold me to this as I may go back to my original plan. I have to meet with a specialized school counselor before anything is decided AND I have to take the damn math test I am so dreading. You think listening to me is frustrating? Try being me!

NEWS FLASH!

UH OH! I think crush's last day was today. DAMNIT! How can that be? He just said good bye as in gave hugs good bye to his co-workers. I heard the words "good luck on your real job" and then he replied "we'll see how the project goes." Blasphemy! How could this happen? I think I am in shock............. (and being overly melodramatic for sake of blog, so really, on to the next one I suppose).

I have officially reached the sweating behind the knees stage. It's time to hit the road and sit in the air conditioned car for a minute or 10. I had a funny or stupid thought just now; "Don't sweat it."

And so to keep in line with all things new in my life, I will find a new crush to go with my new apartment, new town, new school and new friends and all will be well in the world again.

He was tall. I melted. He smiled. I felt it. His eyes were blue. So are mine. He served me coffee. I took my time. His name was Colin. Now he's gone. ~ Renee Michelle